Let me start with a little reflection on decluttering…

I started my decluttering in 2011. I think I was ahead of the trend. By a smidge anyway. I had a tonne of boxes to go through because of my separation and move to my solo life apartment. I was depressed and anxious. I wanted to feel better about myself, my stuff and my space. I happened upon the book Magical Housekeeping: Simple Charms and Practical Tips for Creating a Harmonious Home by Tess Whitehurst and used it to clear up my space both physically and emotionally. It might not be the book for everyone, but I learned a lot from that book. It started me on my road to minimalism and simple living.

It also got me shaking maracas I got in Cuba during a solo heart healing vacation and burning sage to move energy around. I love doing both of these things.

There is something to be said about doing things with intention. Doing things with intention makes action more meaningful. It makes change more likely to stick. it sets a foundation and focus on how you want to feel and what actions you need to take to get you there. It helps you get things done, stay present and optimistic.

I think it’s a very powerful thing.

I have a tattoo of the letter I on the inside of my right wrist. It stands for INTENTION.

Blog Break

Hello my blog friends! The blog has been quiet for a few months because I moved. It was quite the endeavour as I moved to an entirely new city (Montreal to Ottawa).

I spent most of April preparing for the move. I did a tremendous purging of belongings as I went from a 1000 sq feet space to a 450 sq feet one. I sold my bed, TV, bureau (set of drawers? commode? what the heck is it called?), shelving, kitchen island, and dining room table. I gave away a lot of clothes and books. I shredded and recycled a lot of paper documents. I listened to The Minimalist Podcasts through out which helped both pass the time and inspire me. Definitely something I need as I did this all on my own.

In May I made the move and promptly got hit by a horrible cold. So much sinus pain and such a disgusting cough. Then my cat Rufus came down with a life threatening urinary blockage. It was a very scary experience – emotionally and financially. He is OK now but it was so stressful because all my money was tied up in the move. On top of that I started a new job. It’s great in so many ways and it makes me quite happy. But like every new job there is a learning curve and that took up whatever little energy I had left. Hence the blog break.

Now I am settled and ready to write again. Expect quite a few posts in the coming days!

Clearing Space, Mindfulness & Sex

I have been doing much clearing this year. Of damaging habits, old strategies that were hurting more than they were helping. It is an on going process of internal, mindful recalibrating of the way I think, perceive and respond.

I have also been doing this in a physical way. If you follow me on Twitter you will have noticed tweet about shredding and purging.

One of the other things I have been doing in this recalibration is a mix of the mind and the body. I have created a new morning routine for myself! I was inspired after reading Be More With Less‘  Courtney Carver’s mini course How To Create a Meaningful Routine. I am going to apply the principles (slowly – you gotta do it slowly) for my evening routine.

Well, what does this have to do with sexuality, you ask?


Because nothing we experience as human beings exists in a vacuum, in isolation. It is all interconnected. Practicing mindfulness allows us to be present in the moment. Not get lost in the past and simmer in regretful thoughts. Not Worry about the future or get lost in fantasy futures. Just the here and now. It is really all we have.

Mindfulness can be a part of all of our experiences – including sexual ones. In fact, as someone who had a tendency to (over)analyze, (over)think and (over)dramatize when it comes to sex I have found mindfulness an amazing tool to get out of the stories in my head and get connected to my mind, body and spirit.

This morning I read this passage from The 7 Lively Sins: How to Enjoy Your Life, Dammit  and it seemed rather relevant to sex as mindfulness practice.

Sex is just a sweaty form of meditation. Think about it. The best lustful sex is about being in the moment, not obsessing about the past or future… or if your thighs look fat in a particular position… and so this means that orgasm is not the ONE AND ONLY big lure of lustful sex. A less obvious secondary benefit is that feeling of supreme peace that comes after sex – and this peacefulness isn’t entirely due to reaching orgasm, but ALSO due to reaching one’s metaphysical spirit, by being fully in the metaphysical moment. SO when we feel good after a lustful sex, it’s partially because we’ve emptied our cluttered brain of its chattering.